Orgasms

Full Title: Orgasms: How to Have Them, Give Them, and Keep Them Coming
Author / Editor: Lou Paget
Publisher: Broadway Books, 2001

 

Review © Metapsychology Vol. 8, No. 25
Reviewer: Christian Perring, Ph.D.

Orgasms is a
straightforward book about achieving sexual pleasure.  It has nine chapters and
two appendices, covering topics such as myths about orgasms, the biology of
orgasms, the psychology of orgasms, male and female orgasms, medical concerns,
sex toys and spirituality.  It is illustrated with line drawings that help to
clarify the text.  It is written in simple language without using any slang, and
contains information and suggestions that range from the basic to the
sophisticated. 

Paget emphasizes the different
kinds of physical response involved in different kinds of orgasms, with graphs
showing various possible male and female response cycles.  She discusses a
number of different kinds of bodily stimulation and the different experiences
that they provide.  For women, these causes are clitoral, vaginal and cervical,
G-spot and AFE, urethral, breast/nipple, mouth, anal, blended, zone, and fantasy. 
For men, they are intercourse, manual, oral, prostate and anal, fantasy,
nipple/breast and toys.  Sexologists might be concerned that she does not
adequately distinguish between the different kinds of stimulation that cause
orgasms and the different kinds of orgasms that can be caused, but for most
people, this won’t be a distinction that needs making carefully.  As a
practical guide, Orgasms is mainly focused on how to achieve these
different orgasms. 

There is some discussion of sexual
problems, such as reduced desire, impotence and premature ejaculation, but it
doesn’t go into much detail, and people with those issues will probably want to
seek out more specialized self-help books.  Paget’s chapter on psychology
contains standard advice; communication between couples is important, and both
men and women should remember to be romantic rather than simply expecting one’s
partner to be ready for sex with no preparation.  Equally good advice is to
create some psychological space for romance and sex, and to put aside the rest
of one’s worries and concerns that can spoil the experience.  While this may be
true, Paget does not say much about how to stop worrying. 

The final chapter on spiritual sex
is largely based on eastern ideas of tantra, She promises that "Tantric
students fine-tune their senses so that each becomes one with the universe and
their partner."  The drawings show tantric energy slowing in circles from
one person to another.  Even those who are not particularly interested in
eastern religions might want to at least experiment with her suggestions to see
whether they can bring greater pleasure and intimacy.  After all, if it is
indeed possible to achieve spiritual ecstasy through these methods, that would
be a wonderful result, and even if it doesn’t work, it might at least be fun
trying.  

 

© 2004 Christian
Perring. All rights reserved.

 

Christian
Perring
, Ph.D., is Academic Chair of the Arts & Humanities
Division and Chair of the Philosophy Department at Dowling College, Long
Island. He is also editor of Metapsychology Online Review.  His
main research is on philosophical issues in medicine, psychiatry and psychology.

Categories: Relationships, Sexuality, SelfHelp